for all eavesdroppers!

it isn't the best time to think hard, or to be awake either. but i can't sleep, though i thought moments ago i was ready to rest everything of me. once again my thoughts are bewildered. and only one person can transform my emotion into something anyone wouldn't expect i will at this very moment.

i feel dizzy, maybe because the last time i put something in my mouth was almost 8 hours ago. i'm trembling, but this i'm certain not because of the hunger im feeling. it's because of my ailing heart. [yes. this blog is all about again the son-of-a-bitch endless topic of heartaches!]

Why is it that we have to shout for others to hear want we wanna say but can't even whisper it to the one we would certainly want him/her to hear it?!

im feeling like i'm scratching salt on my nearly-healed would. i don't know what to feel. it's good to hear something from him after a while. but, i really don't know now if i should continue healing myself or again turn around and forget all about the over coming stuffs. im so pathetic.

i'm not ready to hear his voice again. and im sure im not ready to face him again. i know im stronger now. strong enough to save myself from total madness. this is my way of keeping myself sane. but now i can't see the heroine in me.

i don't even know if i want to stay or not. im helpless. and i don't know if im making any sense at all. maybe im lunatic before i knew it.

Christmas Vacation Checklist 2008!

Kahit bakasyon gus2 ko parin maging productive.I'm the type of person na ayaw matengga! Kaya every long vacation gumagawa ako ng checklist ng mga bagay na tingin ko dapat kong gawin.

Not so important na may matututunan akong bago. Basta ung feel ko lang na kailangn ng attention ko this vacation un ung nilalagay ko. Xempre in consideration sa duration ng vacation. and my goal?! xempre magawa lahat ng nasa checklist ko! n.n

Para kahit bakasyon, may pinagkakaabalahan ako. ^^

Feeling ko kasi pag nakahilata lang ako all day nasasayang ung oras ko. And time spilled can never get back. Kaya kahit manuod ng movie papatusin ko! masabi lang na may gingawa ako. ^^

Now here's my Christmas Vacation Checklist 2008

+ Powerpoint presentation ng report namin sa Entrep

+ Paliguan ang CR ko

+ Room General Cleaning

+++ magpalit ng bedsheet [check! nagawa ku na. n.n]

+++ punasan ang computer set

++ + ausin ang closet ko [muka na xe gubat!]

+++ re-arrange ang dresser

+ Magpa-alter ng uniform [ndi ko alam kung pumayat ako o tumba. ung isa kasing uniform ko sumikip! ung isa lumuwang! weird.]

+ Maghanap ng possible sponsors for Batingaw

+ Simulan ang Scrapbook ko

+ Simulan ang Album ko

+ Read Twilight na niregalo sakin ni Mikhail

+ Gawan ng template si Mhanie


Ayan. ayan ang mga nakalinya sa mga gagawin ko. Xempre excluded na jan ung paglabas at paglalakwatsa paminsan minsan. n.n

Happy Holidays! n.n
Enjoy your vacation! *wink

"When you can live forever, what do you live for?"

"About three things i was absolutely positive.

first, Edward was a vampire.

second,there was a part of him - and i didn't know how dominant that part might be - that thirsted for my blood.

and third, i was unconditionally and irrevocably in love with him."
~Bella


last full show
sm manila
cinema 7
jaja fritz koko geno puno and i

I know there is such thing as movie review. Pero i wanna share it by blog. I don't want to be a spoiler sa mga hindi pa nakakanuod at kasalukuyang nagbabasa ng blog ko. Pero can't help it! cguro pag napanuod mu na maiintindihan mo na ko! hahahaha. so im giving you time to click on the another link to make you stop from reading this.


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and you decided to read. hehehe
Edward was a vampire. well, ndi xa ganun kagwapo. thick eyebrows, ndi pantay ilong, maputla, malapad muka. manlait daw ba?! hehehe pero un ang unang tingin ko sakania. then eventually as the film keeps on rolling, he became beautiful in my eyes. ndi ako nainlove sa kania ano! what i mean is, nagugus2han ko slowly ung character nia. and sweet nia for a vampire! hehehe. at sakania ko lang nalaman na may powers pala ang vampires gaya ng kay spiderman! haha

**pinigilan nia ung car na dapat bubunggo kay bella with his bare hands
**para xang super hero na always to the rescue kay bella in times of need
**in state of confusion siguro xa, biruin mo hindi mo alam kung anong maiisip nia pag tinitingnan nia si bella. kung isang labidabs ba o isang masarap na pagkaen!
**cool pa ng car
**may powers
**malakas
**nakakateleport
**mysterious(which i really like!)

sweet! parang gus2 ko na tuloy ng vampire lover! haha pero nakakatakot. biruin mo hahabulin ka na ng ibang vampire para kainin?! panu kung di dumating si edward on time?! edi dedu na ko?! hahaha wala ng next movie! hahaha

aun. super nabitin ako sa movie! super talaga. hindi ko namalayan na tapus na!
ang ibig sabihin nadala talaga ako sa story. what more pa kaya pag binasa ko ung libro!

katulad nga ng sinabi ko,
im looking forward sa susunod na movie nito

but as of now, im aiming to own a twilight!
hahaha. sana mabuo ku ung apat! dang mahal ee

panuorin mo na din! ^^

PS. tumatanggap ako ng gift na libro! hahaha

Ms.Fortune 01

hay naku! just wanna share a bad day! para naman di ako mabaliw kung sasarilinin ko 2 dba?! so tutal may mga times ang tao ay minamalas ng sunod sunod sa loob lang ng isang araw. I've decided to do this. I'll treat this (ms.fortune) na parang column sa magazine! pero xempre magsusulat lang ako kung kelan feeling ko e hinahabol ako ng kamalasan! so expect na meron pang ms.fortune 02, 03...

date: november 9, 2008
settings: mula san andres, to padre faura, jollibee, to quiapo, to sm fairview, to almar, to bahay
time: in between 7:30 - 12:00 mn

7:30. nasa san andres pa kaming batingaw, rehearsing for our up coming play on november 17 and 18 sa Lyceum freedom hall (nuod kau! hehe). kakatapos lang ng DR with ate wy-ann, writer of SALA. and by this time, i can already feel my thumping heart dahil di na ako mapakali! ang paalam ko sa bahay ay manunuod lang ng SINE! kamusta naman?! 10:30am ako umalis ng bahay! anung petsa na ako nakauwi! and one more thing, hindi na xe ako pinapayagan ni mama na magbatingaw. hmmm. i guess lahat naman kami sa batingaw ay illegal na sa mga kanya-kanya naming mga magulang. mabibilang mu lang sa kamay ang mga pinapayagan ng buong puso ng mga magulang. unfortunately, hindi ako kasama sa mga yun! haiz...

hindi naging maganda ang feedback ng SALA from ate wy-ann. xempre nakakadepress! and time pressure pa dahil pass 7:30 na! dahil di maganda, tinanung kami ni ate wy-ann kung ano ang problema! at nakutuban ko ng magtatagal lalo ang usapan na ito! haist! kaya nagvolunteer na ako na magsalita. ee iyakin ang watashi! kahit na di dapat iyakan, dahil sa mixed emotion na naramdaman ko kanina, di ko napgilan! dagdag pa ung sikmura ko! bakit?! teka magmath tayo!

maasim n mangga + mais n may margarine w/ butter + ensaymada + pop = sakit ng tiyan!

hay ang galing ko dba?! kaw ba naman kumain ng ganian! dremarino xe ee!
dremarino = combination of drema ang guerino
drema = from the play SALA, a woman with excessive LUST in her body
guerino = also from SALA, a person who is matakaw!

math ulit!

drema + guerino = dremarino! (ako un! haha)

7:45pm dismiss na kami! sa wakas! ito ang pinakamaagang dismissal namin! sumakay kami jip pa padre faura. i'm with my pokleng jessa. when we got there naglakad kami pa puntang jollibee UN avenue. para magbihis, coz im in PJs!, at para bumili ng pagkaen dahil wala pa kaming matinong lunch.

after nun nag-abang na kami ng masasakyan sa tapat ng jollibee. at dito nagsisimula ang jinx! parang my strike! kahit anong medium ng papuntang fairview wala! what happen sa mga rumaratsadang jeepney na rutang sm fairview na akala mo ay minamaneho ng drayber na galit sa preno! ayaw tapakan ee! ndi ko naorasan kung gaano kami katagal tumayo dun. naabutan na nga kami ni te ruth , na taga fairview din, habang nagaantay. pissed off, nagdecide kaming magquiapo nalang muna. im sure meron ng masasakyan dun, at naglipana pa! ung mga FX at jeep na quiapo ilalim! but to our surprise, ndi rin pala maxado nahirapan din kami sumakay! thank god may isang jeep! at xa ang kauna unahan naming nakitang jip na pabyaheng fairview ng gabing yoon!

antagal ng byahe! mula litex gang regalado traffic! anu bang nangyayari sa pilipinas! wah! kung kelan nagmamadaling umuwi tsaka naman nagkaletche letche! siguro mula litex gang regalado 1hr namin binabay! ng dahil sa traffic!

at pagdating sa sm fairview, huala! dagat ng mga pasaherong sabik ng makatungtong ng bahay! nakakawindang ang mga pangyayari! pagbaba ko ng jeep biglang sobrang daming people ang sasalubong sau?! strucked. napatayo lang kami ni ate ruth! di namin alam kung ano gagawin, kung panu mauunahan ang lagpas sang daang taong nag aabang ng jeepney.

tinext ko na si mama. baka xe pwede akong masundo ni uncle gamit scooter. but wait! ang uncle ko kung kelan kailangan! lashing! hahaha! uncle?! you rock talaga! haha

fortunately! may jeep na byaheng almar ang huminto sa harap namin at nagbaba ng ilang pasahero! ang ibig sabihin nun, may free seats na! kaya walang patumpiktumpik sumakay na kami ni ate ruth! yehey! (sound effect= clap clap clap)

ngunit hindi pa jan natatapos ang kamalasan! sa jeep may naktabi akong dalawang lalaki. so di bale ganito ang porma namin

ate ruth ako guy #1 guy #2

at wiit! si guy #2 nakahawak sa bewang ni guy #1! kitang kita ko! hahaha at lasing si guy #2! maya maya. biglang nagsuka si guy #2! eeewness! yuck! grabe! wag kasi iinom pag di kaya! at ang sabi pa ni guy #1 (sa kunwaring malaking boses)

"pare, nasa jeep tayo! wala na tayo sa inuman!"

ee halata namang kaliga! hahaha kahit pakiramdam ko di pa sila taym para bumaba. sa kahihiyan ee bumaba na sila! kawawang bakla. taga alalay sa lasing na jowa!

pag dating sa almar! may pond of passengers din! hay akala ko last na ung sa sm! buti nalang after how many minutes of paghihintay nakasakay din ako. hay. slight thanx na rin sa barker na mejo kinukulit ako eveytime na maaabutan nia ako magabang ng jeep! sabi ba naman skin nun one time "mamahalin mo din ako! maniwala ka sakin!" hala xa?! hahaha thnx na rin sa kania at nakasakay ako.

finally, home!

siguro kinainisan ko itong araw na ito for today! pero im pretty sure na bukas lang tatawanan ko ito. hahaha! ^^

happy HALF-birthday to me!

Just checking my friendster and multiply account when I saw the blog post of Andy.

The title was quite interesting, "belated half-birthday to me!"

oh dba?! head-turning?!

hehehe

kaya I tried it. Just for fun! ^^

My half-birthday is on...

JULY 19! (sound effects = party poppers!)

yeeaa! ^^

I've got another day to celebrate aside from my birthday and my 2nd birthday!

(my 2nd bday is the day I was baptized to be a Catholic, according to our Parish Priest)

here is the list of my birthdays!

1st birthday = January 17

2nd birthday = October 20

half-birthday = July 19

Isn't it fun?! 3 birthdays in 1 year!

That will cause three inuman/party/happy2/watsoever sessions!

yeah! ^^


Wanna know your half birthday?!

click on the cake! ^^

Hallelujah Chance!

It’s been a while! tagal ko ng hindi nakapagblog! hahahaha. Busy lang. Hirap maging atista. hehe (jodan dake. ^^)

I never been so attached sa mga Nihonjin. We’ll except the fact that I have a Japanese step dad and a half japanese little brother. hindi ako ganun kahilig sa mga anime. and i think they do stupid things so much (bakka!). And that was it. That was then! not until mapanood ko Proposal Daisakusen! waaaa. I wanna rewatch it everytime i tell its title! lahat naman siuro gus2 ng happy endings. Pano kung ung happy ending ay hindi para sayo? Kaya mo ba makitang kinakasal mahal mo? hay naku. YAMAPi. nakakainis ka. yummy mu. hahahaha. hindi lang naman si yamapi ang dahilan ng pagkahibang ko sa proposal, the story itself. hindi mo mapipigilang manuod. every episode xe maeexcite la para sa next episode. kaya ang nangyari, nabuburo ako sa harap ng pc namin! hehehe. pero ok lang. it’s worth watching for.

Sana makagawa din ng ganito ang philippines. ung bang mapapaiyak ka sa sobrang sweet. dami ko na xe napapanuod na ganun. pero from korea and japan (recently) ung mga napapanuod ko. next tym philippines naman!

:: hallelujah chance! nooooooo. c:

tingnan mo nga xa! ang yummy nu?! haha

YAMAPImylab

Beat Stress

A little Stress is a good thing. It makes us feel alive by keeping our body busy
in pursuing something. It makes us longing for our own bed, at pagkatapos ng
isang buong araw makakatulog tayo ng mahimbing sa pagod. However, our bodies were never designed to handle the formidable amount of stress we face daily with our complicated world. So much stress can rob us of our health and our happiness. As they say, lahat ng sobra, masama.

Thetips below can’t guarantee to give you a stress-free life – nothing can. But at
least it can suggest ways to deal positively with stress and mitigate its destructive effects.

1. PREPARE FOR IT. Stress happens to everyone. Daily. Para lang syang problema na binibigay ni God, lahat may solusyon. It is just on how we are going to deal with it, we can either accept it or run before it.

2. PINPOINT YOUR STRESSORS. To know a solution you must know the problem first. To know the cure you must study the disease first. This is also applicable with stress. Alamin mo muna kung ano ba ang nakakapagstress sayo. What are your biggest stressors? Illness? Peer? Unresolved conflict? Finances? Recognizing your main sources of stress is the first step toward reducing their effect on you.

“What you can’t see CAN hurt you.”

3. STOP PLAYING THE LONERANGER. Human beings just aren’t designed to conquer life on their own, some situations requires a call for help. Kung ikaw naman yung taong may problema sa paghingi ng tulong o sa pagopen sa ibang tao. Remember, the help you need is always there. It is just up to you on how you conquer the fear of approaching people and the fear of rejection (in some cases). Asking for help when you need it is a sure sign of maturity – not weakness.

“Sticks in a bundle are breakable.” –Kenyan Proverb

4. RECOGNIZE THAT IMAGE ISN’T EVERYTHING. How much time you put portraying a certain image to those around you? Does it affect the way you choose, the way you dress, the way you walk, and the way you laugh? Trying to be someone you’re not is a source of stress that grows with time.

“Each of us is an original.” – Galathians 5:26 The Message

“Why be a copy when you can be an original.”

5. LET GO OF THE PAST. Of course, lahat tayo may mga bagay na pinagsisisihan. Yung mga bagay na sana hindi nalang natin ginawa. Pero it happened, at wala tayong powers para ibalik yun. Ito nalang isipin mo, you spend time thinking about the past, pero iniisip ka ba ng past?! Funny may it sound. Pero totoo. Open up sa mga taong tingin mo ay makakatulong at makakaintindi sayo. And help yourself, help yourself put the past where it belongs – in the past.

“A rearview mirror is for backing up, not moving forward.”

6. REFUSE TO LIVE IN THE FUTURE. Just like the # 5. Living in the past or at the future is not a good idea. Kaya nga tinawag na present di ba? Don’t worry about tomorrow, coz tomorrow will worry for itself. Worrying acts like a magnifying glass – it makes everything to look bigger than it really is.

7. BREAK YOUR DAY DOWN INTO A BITE-SIZED PIECES. Kung titingnan mo ang schedule mo na punong puno ay nakakapagod nga naman. Katulad ko. A lot of times nangyayari sakin yung ganian. Pero try to remember that a mountain is climed one step at a time. Treat your schedule as a five-thousand-piece jigsaw puzzle. If you’ll just scatter the pieces, it will look very difficult to solve. But if you start looking for corners, sorting by colors, and finding the edge pieces, slowly the final picture begins to take shape. Enjoy ka na sa ginagawa mo, nakaka-accomplish ka pa.

8. BREATHE IN, BREATHE OUT. When you feel the tension arising, try this deep-breathing exercise. Put your feet flat on the floor and rest your hands in your lap. Relax your body by dropping your shoulders and closing your eyes. Then take a deep breath through your nose, while slowly counting to four. Exhale through your mouth to a slowly count of four.

“Breathe easier by breathing deeper.”

9. PET A PET. You know what’s nice when having a pet? You can hug them and show your love with them without having the fear of rejection.

10. CULTIVATE QUIET. It is nice to have a break when you feel like all the tensions are on your shoulder. Stop a while and let yourself think for a moment.

11. TWIST AND SHOUT. Dancing feels good for a reason. Hindi masama to visit a bar and dance all your stresses away. It is indeed another form of releasing the stress in you. And who knows, you might meet someone interesting. ^^

12. USE IT OR LOSE IT. Magbawas ng gamet! I admit guilty ako dito! Sabi nga ng nanay ko basurera ako! Hehehehe. I used to keep things that are no use. Having a lot of things to keep is quite stressing. So kung hindi mo na talaga kailangan yung isang bagay, better throw it off.

13. EAT EVEN FAST FOOD SLOW. Indulge yourself. It is nice to take a break and eat after hours of brain storming. Taste your food, chew it slowly. Find the pleasure of eating.

14. FORGIVE YOURSELF. Admit it. You’re not perfect – no one is. God has already promised his forgiveness. What’s holding you back from forgiving youself?

15. STARE AT THE STAR. Stop, even for just a minute. And take a look around the creation that God made for His children. Look up to stars and feel the mystery of it’s every twinkle. Maniwala ka, stars have magic that lets the child out of you.

16. TURN OFF THE TUBE. Okey lang naman manuod ng TV. Pero kung sobra it will just be a stressor for you. How? It replaces chores that have to be done. Or assignment that has to be accomplished. Limit yourself. Know when is the entertainment can bring bad effect.

17. LAUGH, GIGGLE, CORTLE AND SNORT. Laugh all you want! Without thinking of what the others might think of you. Do you still remember the feeling ng hindi makahinga kakatawa? Or yung naiiyak kakatawa. Sarap dba?

18. CRY YOUR HEART OUT. Crying is a mature-thing. Hindi ibig sabihin ng pag-iyak ay mahina ka. It just reminds you that you’re still human. It crying keeps you Human.

19. LISTEN TO MUSIC. Sabi nga nila, music sometimes can tell what your mouth is afraid of saying. Listen to songs. Kaw na bahala kung anung type of songs. Kung anong trip mo. Loud or soft.

20. LOVE EXTRAVAGANTLY. Don’t stop yourself on loving someone. Remember there is no wrong decision in love. Only undecided questions! Don’t be afraid to love, even though you know you can’t be love back the way you want. Eh ano naman?! God has loved you before you knew him.

21. KEEP A JOURNAL. Para sa mga susunod na panahon may mababasa ka at tatawanan. Hehehe. Pero swear. It helps.

To: Munirih B. Villaseñor

Vivid = Chocolate Cake

Kim Jayson Maranan Marasigan
para sayo 'toh!

Main Entry: viv·id

Pronunciation: \vi-vəd\

Function: adjective

Etymology: Latin vividus, from vivere to live — more at quick

Date: 1634

1of a color : very strong : very high in chroma

2: having the appearance of vigorous life or freshness : lively vivid sketch>

3: producing a strong or clear impression on the senses : sharp, intense; specifically : producing distinct mental images vivid description>

4: acting clearly and vigorously vivid imagination>

Before i start, i just want to make one thing clear. This is NOT a fan blog entry! Hindi kita idol noh! I was forced to do this remember? And here it is, as you wanted. I really don't know what to put in it. Una sa lahat, wala naman ako maxadong alam tungkol sayo. Hindi rin tayo ganun kaclose. Bahala na! lalagay ku nalang kung ano si BANGS sa mata ko!

Hindi ko alam kung sakin lang, o sa lahat ng tao. Pag kinakausap ko kasi xa, without the influence of alcohol, hindi na ako mageexpect ng matinong sagot! Lagi nalang xe pang-aasar nakukuha ku sakania! Masaya xa kasama. Masakit sa tiyan! [kakatawa] Yun nga lang ako lagi nakikita nia para asarin! Madalas hindi ko siya mabasa. There are times na serioso, the type na you don't know what runs in his head.

He hate numbers. He detest Algebra. unlike me, he prefer letters than numbers. he write songs. Sabi niya he had written one for me. Never ko naman narinig! hindi ako maniniwala hangga't di ko naririnig. Mahilig xa sa morbid na mga kanta. EMO xa sabi nia.

When i hear his name, to tell you honestly, puro pang-ookray naalala ko! and that's how rude he is. Hindi ka nia titigilan hangga't di ka nia napapaiyak! So i'll tell you, when you walk through the lyceum's corridor, don't ever pass kung nasan si Bangs!

Pero, under alcohol, he evolves. Ibang iba dun sa Bangs na pinakilala ko kanina. Matino na siya kausap. Pati yung mga ginagawa niya way back nung High School nakkwento na niya. And when he's drunk, he's just the perfect talk-partner. Surpisingly, pareho kami ng interests. Katulad nalang sa Mangga! Parehong indian mango. Pati fireworks and stars. Nagkakasundo kami sa maraming bagay! [ayoko man iadmit! tse...]

Most memorable moment ko with him. Actually kelan lang e, sa cavite, nung nakakita kami ng shooting star. The story was, may tinuturo xa saking constellation and suddenly the star shoot. Lam mu kung panu kami nagreact?? talun2! parang nanalo sa lottery! Hindi naman namin first time makakita ng star nun, but it was different. He taught me the difference of a falling star from a shooting star.

You know why VIVID? Coz we made a deal. About what vivid means. When I won, he'll bake me a cake. But if i didn't, I'll create him a blog entry. Alam mo na siguro nangyari. Kaya nga pinanganak ang blog na toh ee.

He's actually a sweet guy. He can bake you a cake, set fireworks for you, travel far just to be with you. Ok, most romantic guy i ever met yet. [urkh! hirap sabihin xyet.] Sana di mo toh mabasa.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Pano ba yan! antok na ko 2:07am na.
Cake or no cake? bahala ka na.
goodmornyt.^^

The Seven Planets (inspired by The Little Prince)

I’ve just read the book "The Little Prince" written by Antoine De Saint-Exupery. It’s a 90-page book. If you can see the cover and the illustrations inside the book, it may look like for children. That the story of this book is just like any other stereotype-once-upon-a-time storybook. But it is NOT. If you can just really understand the book, it will tell you a deeper moral. And just like what I did, it will bring you closer to the innocent little prince.

In the story, the little prince traveled from one planet to the other. With each planet, he would meet someone. Someone who tells his profession and his story to the little prince. And someone, who’s on my own perception, represents a human characteristic. Read the following, who knows, you might see yourself in one of those people.^^

Note: These planets are very small. You can almost take a walk around it by 12 small steps! Of course it is round, and you can only put a single chair on top of it for the most!

Planet No. 1- The King
You might wonder, what is the king is for if there’s no people. Well, that doesn’t matter for this King. Coz he thinks he owns the universe, he owns everything his eyes can reach. And he never ever stands from his throne! You have nowhere to sit because the whole planet is covered by the king’s magnificent ermine robe! In our world, he is the type of person who thinks he can have anything with doing nothing.

One of the few phrases that stucked me:

"It is more difficult to judge oneself than to judge others. If you succeed in judging yourself rightly, then you are indeed a man of true wisdom." - KING

Planet No. 2 - Conceited Man
The one who salute whoever pass by his planet by taking his hat off his head. He is someone who admires himself above anybody else. Who thinks that he is superior than anyone. But actually, he is a person with no substance. Para xang isang malaking siopao na puro hangin lang ang laman.

Planet No. 3 - Tippler
He drinks so he can forget that he is ashamed, ashamed of drinking! In reality, he is someone who thinks that life’s problem can be erased by a glass of alcohol. But it is not. It may get out of your mind some time. But it will inevitably come back.

Planet No. 4 - The Business Man
Counting stars. Who fool will do this? Will you? He did. Thinking that the stars are his property because no one ever thinks to own the stars. They are the people who are lost. Who didn’t know the real meaning of living or yet didn’t know what they are born for. They are so busy chasing things. Things that we don’t really need. They make themselves stressed by making money, and planning how to grow their equity. They make their lives complicated, where in fact they can choose a simple yet more meaningful life.

Planet No. 5 - Lamplighter
He turns on the light when the sun sets and turns off when the sun shines. And because as time runs by, the rotation of the planet becomes faster until the time came that he has no time even just to sit nor sleep. In reality, he is the one who do favor for the others without thinking of his own condition.

Planet No. 6 - The Geographer
Geographers are those people who know best in terms of landforms and locations. But this geographer knows nothing. Because he believes that the job of a geographer is to tally things, while it is the job of the traveler to travel from place to place and report to the geographer. As I can see him, I can tell that he is the type of person who made a lot of excuses just to save him from being the one to blame.

Planet No. 7 - The Planet Earth
And the last planet was the Earth. Where he met the fox, who taught him of a great lesson. The lesson of becoming special to someone. Of becoming unique , of becoming the only one above anybody. TAME - letting someone be a part of your life.

"To me you are still nothing more than a little boy who is just like a hundred thousand other little boys. And I have no need of you. And you, on your part, have no need on me. To you, I am nothing more than a fox like a hundred thousand other foxes. But if you tame me, then we shall need each other. To me, you will be unique in all the world. And to you, I shall be unique in all the world…" -FOX

He also met the roses. He has his rose, in his planet. before, he thinks that his rose is the only rose in the universe. and when he saw the hundred thousan other roses on Earth he became sad. Sad because his rose is no longer unique. But as the fox taught him. He then understands that his rose is the only one.

"You are not like my rose. As yet you are nothing. No one has tamed you, and you have tamed no one. you are like my fox when I first knew him. He was only a fox like a hundred thousand other foxes. But I have made him my friend. And now he is unique in all the world. You are beautiful but you are empty. One could not die for you. To be sure, an ordinary passerby would think that my rose looked just like you - the rose that belongs to me. But in herself alone she is more important than all hundreds of you other roses. Because it is she that I have watered; because it is she that I have put under the glass of globe; because it is she that I have sheltered behind the screen; because it is for her that I have killed the caterpillars (except the two or three that we saved to become butterflies); because it is she that I have listened to, when she grumbled, or boasted, or even sometimes when she said nothing. Because she is my rose." -LITTLE PRINCE

I may be, at times, like the Tippler, who drinks to forget and at times like the geographer. This things happen simply because I'am Human. but this won't matter, as long as I know when and where to act as a Kid and an Adult. Life is a matter of choices, it's just up to you whether to choose right or left.


--The Little Prince

for my COPY CAT!

Blogging. It is my way of showing how i feel. This has been my outlet. When i want to say something but there's no one to listen, i write. and write. until someone reads it. until someone feels how i felt. until someone understand me.

I write, actually i type, to let others feel that they're not alone in the same situation. There are a lot of people who are suffering under the same consequences. I write. To help people. to educate them. and to teach them how to understand themselves.

I am really glad when someone reads my posts. specially when they leave a comment. it feels like all the typing of every letters on the keyboard is worth a while. someone appreciates my thoughts. someone appreciates me.

But for you. you over appreciated me. you copy what i have written without my permission or even without citing me. do you know the word CITATION? tinuturo xa sa school! it is uses when you intend to use somebody else's work. hindi ba naturo sau un? san ka ba nag-aaral?

Confessions of a Daughter

I am student. I am an officer, a theater actress. I am cheerleader. I am critic, I am reader and a writer. I am an artist in my own ways. I am a dreamer of my own future. I am a dancer who can sing. I am a nature-saver. I am a lover, I am a friend. I am God's child. But above all, I am a Daughter.

this is my confession. you copied it. and you even quoted it with your fuckin name! i hate you. i detest you. you know why? coz this post, i made it especially for my mom. a tribute for all of her sacrifices. not for your mom, not for somebody else's mom, but ONLY for my mom! got it?

you were once my student. you were once my friend. i know you. you were great back then. you were smart. what the hell happened? i believe you can do your own writings. pero bakit kailangn mu pa kopyahin ung gawa ko? are you unsatisfied with your thoughts that you have to snatch my thoughts? see that picture below? yes. it is you. you with my words. the first paragraph of my post. and your name saying these set of words comes from your own mind originally! this is a very dumb thing to do. our world is small. we have so much friends in common. a friend of mine told me about your blog. i checked it for confirmation. and i was perplexed by what i saw. i was really shocked.

this feeling is normal. siguro this is what a journalist feels when someone copy-paste his job. and this is what im feeling right now!
don't make me angry, you won't like me when i'm angry.

you degrade yourself.

for me you're a disgrace.

envy belongs to the 7 deadly sins. (try to read a bible, or even go to church)

don't try be me. you can't.

i know i'll hurt you with this post i made. but this is my way of turning the table. of letting you know how hurt i was.

sayang...

you ruined your good-image on me.

you ruined my trust.

for my friends who wants to read HER posts (the she copied) here's the link:

http://annamiral.blogspot.com/

Dadaanin ko Nalang sa Kanta! Lalala

12:30am

gising pa ako. kakalaro ng SIMS 2, ang tanging PC games na kinalolokohan ko. may okasyon ngaun. pero hindi ko naisip agad. father's day. kaya lang. wala lang sakin. wala naman ako paghahandaan ng surpresa o sasamahan kumaen sa labas. kaya ang araw na toh, wala lang. natulog na ako.

4:30am

nagising ako. ang aga ba? araw ngaun ng linggo. at paglinggo maaga kami nagsisimba. sa simbahan. wala ring iba. bukod sa bahagyang pagdami ng mga bilang ng nagsisimbang lalaki. [kadalasan kasi babae ang nagsisimba] natapos ang misa. bago ibigay ang huling basbas ng pare at hudyat ng katapusan ng misa, isang pastor ang umakyat sa alter, doon sa lugar na pinagbabasahan ng unang pagbasa. magbabasa siya, hindi isang mabuting balita mula sa diyos o isang awit mula sa bibliya, kundi, isang sulat. isang sulat na wari ba'y ibibigay niya sa kaniyang anak. napatigil ako. nakinig ako.

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naisip ko. tama siya. maraming ipinag kait sating dalawa. mabibilang lang sa kamay ko ang mga araw na kasama kita. at kung kelan ang huli, limot ko na. hindi ko na rin maalala kung ano ang itsura mo, kung paano ka tumindig, at ngumiti. wala na akong matandaan. wala na.

kokonti lang ang impormasyong alam ko sayo. pangalan, trabaho, kung san ka nakadestino dati, ilocano, at salbahe. ayon sa salita ng nanay ko. lahat ng yan tinandaan ko. dahil yan lang ang mayayakap ko sa tuwing nananabik ako sayo.

pinagkait satin ang gisingin kita ng halik nung bata pa ako, magpatimpla ng gatas, magpabili sayo ng minatamis o kahit anong makakasira ng ngipin ko. pinagkait satin ang kumaen ng sabay sa hapag. kahit kwentuhan, kinuha satin.

siguro ay nakasalubong na kita sa daan ng minsang naglalakad ako sa kalsada. o nagkasabay ng sumakay ng elevator. lukso ng dugo. gaano ba kalapit dapat ang isang tao para maramdaman mong may koneksyon kayo? kung alam ko lang. sana nayakap na kita.

sana naging isang masayang pamilya tayo. buo. simple. masaya. katulad ng isang larawang ginuguhit ng isang paslit sa papel sa eskwelahan. payak. pero minsan, mahirap makuha. labing walong taon gulang na ako. tanggap ko na. na kailanman. hindi tayo magiging buo. na ako. ay parang isang tali na nagdudugtong sa dalawang tao. un lang. dugtong. wala ng iba.

------------------------------------

Dadaanin ko nalang sa kanta:

"When I need you, I just close my eyes and i'm with you."

kapag pinipikit ko mata ko, wala kang mukha. hindi ko na maalala. at kung maalala ko man. siguro nag-iba na ang itsura mo. tumanda.

"I hear your voice on the line, But it doesn't stop the pain..."

"Wherever you go, Whatever you do, I will be right here waiting for you."

January 17, 2002. huli kitang nakausap sa telepono. naiyak ako. sana hindi ko nalang sinabi kay mama. sana palihim nalang tayo naguusap. sana ngaun nakikita kita, nahahawakan.

Sumuko na ako sa pamilya natin. mali. hindi pala tayo natawag na pamilya kahit saglit. pero hindi ako susukong makita ka.

"In my dreams I'll always see you soar above the sky. In my heart there always be a place for you for all my life. I'll keep a part of you with me and everywhere I am there you'll be..."

Kalahati ko ay ikaw. kahit san ako mapadpad, my parte ng sakin na ikaw.

-----------------------------------------

pinakamahirap pag-alala nalang ang naiwan sayo. pero sakin. mali. may mas mahirap pa don. pinakamahirap ay ung kahit alaala, wala ka. wala kang babalikan. wala kang iisipin. wala kang gugunitain.

sana hindi ka pa sumusuko. sana katulad ko. umaasa ka pa.

tatlong taon. hahanapin kita. matapos ang tatlong taon. para kahit malaman ni mama at palayasin niya ako ng bahay, ayos lang. may trabaho na ako sa mga oras na iyon. siguro kaya ko na kung palayasin man ako. hintay lang tatang. mgkikita pa tayo.

palaka at daga. bukod dyan. may isa pa akong kinatatakutan. pagkalipas ng tatlong taon. bulaklak at kandila ang dala ko para sayo. sana hintayin mo pa ako. sana malakas ka. matagal na akong naghihintay. taon. at ikaw lang ang lalakeng hihinayin ko ng ganito katagal. tatlong taon. saglit lang yon. wag mo ipagkait sakin ang mayakap ka. dahil sa tuwing pumipikit ako at iniisip kita. laging yakap mo ako ang senario. at sa loob ng tatlong taon. gagawin ko yong makatotohanan. maghintay ka lang tatang.

------------------------------

TATANG: tatay sa ilokano

BALASANG: dalaga sa ilokano -- tawag sakin ni tatang kahit nung bata pa ako

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Happy Father's Day.

EDSA

Isang mainit na araw nagmamaneho ako sa may EDSA
I'm not sure kung saan ako papunta
Kahit mahal ang gasolina, sagot ko na
Basta sa roadtrip ko, kasama ko sya


Pinahinto niya bigla ang sasakyan
Pupunta lang sa tindahan ang paalam
Para bumili ng mamam
Hininto ko ang sasakyan tutal traffic naman


Libong sasakyan na ang lumipas
Wala pa rin ang ahas! [haha. sorry s kania la ku maisip na katunog pa]
May tiket na ako ng pulis
Naghintay pa rin sa kabila ng inis


Wala na ang traffic sa EDSA
Nakapark pa rin at nag-iisa
Naghintay ako dahil choice ko
Inintay ko sya kahit impatient ako


Tanong ko lang sa kanya, babalik ka pa ba?
O magda-drive nalang ako mag-isa
Ang chikot ko'y magoover heat na
Hindi na makapaghihintay pa


Aandar na ako pero nag-iwan ako ng mapa
Para kung sakaling bumalik sya
Upuan sa tabi ko ay bakante
Dahil sya lang ang gus2 kong makatabi


Maraming gustong sumama sa roadtrip ko
Pero sya lang ang pinili ko
Sa wakas, iiwan ko na rin ang EDSA
Kung makita mo siya'y pakisabi nalang sa kanya:


"Sa paglalakad wag masyadong lumayo sa EDSA,
Baka daan pabalik ay makalimutan mo na.
Kung nakabalik ka na sa EDSA at hindi mo ako nakita,
Magtext ka lang, magyu-u-turn ako masundo ka lang."

----------------------------------

EDSA - term na ginagamit ng kalabit sa mga taong hindi makamove on.

***ngaun, ikaw na ang maginterpret sa tulang nabasa mo. ^^

DUDE: salamat. naisip ko toh dahil sa subrang paggamit mu ng term na EDSA! hahahaha. paulit ulit sa text ayan nakagawa tuloy ako tula! thnx anyway. ^^

PARA sa AALAYAN ko neto: hoi! para sayo toh! magbasa ka naman sana ng blog! rambo ka! nagets mo pa ung tula? bawal slow ngaun ah!

KALABIT: ala lang. gus2 ku lang kau special mention. hahahaha. LOL

This is His Way of Saying Goodbye

"06/3/2008 10:03 am

di ko rin alam kung ano nangyare, parang computer na biglang nag log off... im not saying that i dont want you back, i juz dont want to ask you back yet i cant give the necessary treatment you deserve... ill be honest with you i cant provide you what you need now... maybe time will come na i will have time for myself to be happy with you, ang hirap kalaban ng distance and time... di ko kaya..di ko rin alam kung sa lyce pa ba ko magaaral pero i badly want to stay there for you, dahil yun nalang magiging way to work tings out... sana lang pagsakto na yung time anjan ka parin, im not asking you to wait, i juz want things to be the way it should be, kung dumating man yung time na yun at wala ka na, i guess i have to move on, pero i will not move on if chances are mabigyan ng opportunuty.. if you dont want me anymore i wish your happiness to someone else hu can love you more than i can. "


It was a hot summer morning when I turned the laptop on and checked my mail and of course open my friendster account. "New Comments", that sign wasn't new to me. Coz everytime I open my account someone has sent me a comment. But this day is different from the rest. He has sent me a comment once again. And I've thought, just now, that maybe, just maybe, this will be the last or close to the last writtings i'll ever receive from him. That's what he said. Maybe that how he say his goodbyes. Life's really ironic, how can something so beautiful and wonderful has to end? Life is annoying. But, we have no choice. it's part of living. to be loved and to be hurt by those people you love. Maybe it's my fault. maybe his fault. I thought im prepared of what may happen to us. i thought if we make it or break it i can accept. but during that one hot summer morning, i doubt it. i am not prepared. and during that very moment i felt my world just stop, my heart stop supplying blood all over my body. i want to break down. i want to cry. but i can't. coz i don't want others to see me crying. I hope when he says he loves me and still wants me he's saying the truth. So at least the pain will be less. But sometimes I wish he's not telling truth. So i will be hurt. and have no choice but to go through my life alone. so i won't expect, i won't hope. that someday, we'll meet at the right place and time and try our fate again.

Pagkakakilanlan sa St. Clare ng Batch 2005-2006

Minsan. may pinabasa sakin si choi [christian fajardo]. "ang pagkakakilanlan sa PUP" ang title ng artikulo. natuwa ako sa aking nabasa. isang sikat na paaralan, pinaggalingan ng maraming matatagumpay ang karera ng buhay ngaun, may mga butas din pala. bigla akong natawa, naisip ko, kung butas lang din naman. hindi papatalo ang St. Clare jan. dito nagmula ang ideya ko na buuin ang talatang ito. ginawa ko ito nung 4th yr pa ako, sa tulong ng mga mapanlait kong kaibigang KALABIT PENGE.


hindi ko alam kung ang mga napuna namin noon ay ganun parin hanggang ngaun, o nabigyan na ng solusyon o nabago na. pero gus2 ko pa ring ishare. katuwaan nalang. ~.~



#1. may library pero hindi pwedeng pumasok ang high school, hindi pwedeng maguwi ng libro, at walang mga silbi ang mga library card. At higit sa lahat, ang librarian, estudyante!


#2. hindi lahat ng classroom naka-tiles. [may shortage sa budget!]


#3. may internet fee pero hindi pinapayagan ang mga estudyante na maginternet, ang dinadahilan pa minsan walang server!


#4. school na walang principal.


#5. pugad ng mga buraot. [kalabit penge: GUILTY!]


#6. science lab na ginagamit lang pag dumadalaw ang DepEd. [for display?]


#7. ang mga silid na pagpinatay daw ang ilaw ang nagiging Luneta. [daw?]


#8. talamak ang pagmumura ng mga guro. [good example]


#9. isama mo narin ang dalawang telephone booth na hindi nagana.


#10. ang ating mga classroom ay may WINDOOR. window na door pa!


#11. mawawala ba naman ang mga nagbabanguhan at naglilinisang mga CR? Kasi naman ang mga magaganda, bihira lang buksan [for display ulet?]


#12. pag hapon ay may amoy na nakakawindang na pag iyong nalanghap ay gumuguhit sa ilong hanggang sa kadulu-duluhan ng iyong lalamunan .[feeds]


#13. ang mga gwardia na nagiging entrepreneur pag exam na nagbbenta ng 7 yellow paper sa halagang 5 piso at graphing paper sa halagang 1.25 na talaga naming tinatangkilik ng mga makakalimuting estudyante.


#14. isang palatandaan pag-araw ng exam: ang umpok na mga estudyante sa lobby.


#15. nagwewelding ang mga construction worker sa araw na may pasok. [guto lang ata ng aksidente]


#16. ang di matapos tapos na construction at renovation ng aming paaralan.


#17. mga teachers na walang sariling chalk at eraser.


#18. nandyan din ang mga gurong walang ibang gstong gawin kundi kausapin ang blackboard [trans. TALKBOARD!] at gusto sila lagi ang tama.


#19. nandyan din ang electric fan na pinag-aawayan at pinag-aagawan ng mga estudyante lalo na pagkatapos ng PE subject tuwing Friday dahil sa hindi ito umiikot.


#20. paaralang walang bell [meron na ngaun sa tulong ng SGO]


#21. private school na pinaglilinis ang estudyante ng kwarto at hindi pa nakuntento pinagpupulot pa sa gym. [anung silbi ng isang dosenang janitor na buwan buwan may sweldo?]


#22. buwan-buwan may exam! Kabuang!


#23. walang yearbook.


#24. pwedeng kumaen kahit hindi recess.


#25. nap time ng humility [2005-2006] tuwing 1:00-2:20pm. [social at mapeh, kakaantok xe teacher.]


#26. may binibentang non-compulsary ticket ng NAASCU pero wag ka, required!


#27. nasa loob na ang laban ay nagbabayad pa rin ng tickets for NAASCU.


#28. ang mga teacher sa paaralang ito ay marunong mangarate, minsan pag sobrang galit nauuwi sa boxing ang karate. [teacher vs. student ang laban]


#29. sembreak: 3 days, kasama na ang sabado at lingo.


#30. hindi rin mawawala ang mga estudyanteng namamato sa gwardia tuwing hindi nagtatagumpay na makalabas sa school tuwing lunch break.


#31. JS: inumin? Softdrinks. Saan? Sa bote!


#32. HRM students na nagiging waiters at waitresses sa gabi ng JS.


#33. nandito sa St. Clare ang pinakamabait na tao sa buong mundo. [Mrs. Caronongan]


#34. tuwing St. Clare’s day required ang mga estudyanteng magdala ng tigdadalawang itlog at noodles.


#35. kahit sa kalagitnaan ng klase pwede kang magtxt, tumawag sa cellphone makipagchismisan o kahit magpatunog ng malakas gamit ang loudspeaker ng cellphone mo.


#36. computer lab na pagpapawisan ka sa sobrang lamig!


#37. sa dinarami rami ng computer iilan lang ang gumagana ang ilan ay nasira kakakutingting ng mga college students.


#38. sino ba namang estudyante ang makakalimot kay mam yolly na tuwing kumakanta ay napuputol ang litid at sumasadsad ang lalamunan.


#39. once in a blue moon lang pumasok ang mga varsity pero nakaka-marcha.


#40. walang test paper tuwing exam. meron man kukunot ang iyong nuo sa sobrang labo.


#41. makakalimutan ba ang mga war freak na estudyante na kung magsalpukan ay once a week? walang palya.


#42. hindi rin mawawala ang mga guro na pumapasok lang sa silid para [magturo? Hindi.] maupo!


#43. hindi lilipas ang isang linggo na walang mawawalan o mananakawan. Kaya sa oras na tumungtong ka sa St. Clare dapat kang maging alerto 24-oras!


#44. teacher ang magdidikta sa lovelife mo. Kung hindi ang maaari kang bumagsak o hindi naman kaya ay bumaba ang grades.


#45. No ID, No Entry. [pero Joke lang!]


#46. ang aming directress [dati] na pagyumuko, tusok puso, patay.


#47. nandito ang pinamasipag na guro na tuwing nagbibigay ng exam ay puro definition at enumeration sa katamarang magsulat ng test questions. At may pagka-allergic din ata sa chalk dahil hindi nagsusulat sa blackboard.


#48. hindi sini-celebrate ang UN Day at Linggo ng Wika.


#49. college students na kung saan-saan naglelesson. Makikita mu sila sa stage, sa gym sa bleacher at kung san san pa!


#50. ang mga materyales sa construction ay nakatambak sa volleyball court! [san niu kami expect na maglaro aber?]


#51. tuwing dadaan ka sa CR ng boys ay may malalanghap ka na di kanais nais na amoy na dulot ng mga estudyanteng hindi alam kung ano ang gamit ng tubig.


#52. classroom ng humility na walang saksakan. [nakicharge ako kay bruce dati! Sa room nila na katapat ng room namin.]


#53. kahit bagyo may pasok! Saka lang ika-cancel ang kalse pag halos gumiba na ang pader ng classroom. Ika-cancel ng 3pm isang oras bago maguwian.



ano? natawa ka ba? kung may gus2 kang idadag feel free to leave a comment.


ikaw? anong naaalala mo pag nababanggit ang ST. CLARE? ^^

Mr. X and Ms. Y

Unahin ko muna si Ms. Y [kasi mas marami ako gus2 sabihin sa kania]:

ewan ko kung anong topak meron ka. gus2 ng magmove on ng tao, pakawalan mo na! ok. alam kong ang pinapakita mo sa lahat ng tao eeh wala na talaga, wala na. as in tapos ka na sa kania at tapos na ang lahat sa inio. pero bakit ganun? bakit kylangan pang itxt lahat ng nangyayari sayo kay Mr. X?? tingin mo makakamove on talaga xa kung patuloy kaung may commu?? mag isip ka! sabi mo matalino ka diba?! o baka namn ayaw mu talaga siyang ipag-move on dahil gus2 mo ung pakiramdam na may humahabol at naloloka sayo?! wag kang selfish!! masama yan. baka kung anong karma abutin mo. kung gus2 mo na talagang makalimutan ka nia tulungan mo xa teh! wag ka ng magpasweet. nakakabanas ung ganiang ugali eh! wag mu na xa itext o kausapin hanggang makamove on na siya totally! utak lang teh! tulungan mu xa! wag kang makasarili! alam mo namang hirap yung tao dba?? ansama din ng ugali mo eh.
e2 pa. wag na wag ka ng babalik sakania! AYOKO! kahit alam kong un ang gus2 niang mangyari! tama na ung minsan niu ng triny. alam ko namang hindi mo na xa mamahalin ulit eh. alam ko un. at sigurado ako dun. kaya parang awa mu na. tamaan ka naman sana!


Para kay Mr. X:

wag mong sabihin gus2 mo ko dahil alam kong hindi! wag mu paniwalain ang sarili mo na may nararamdaman ka sakin para lang makamove on. dahil alam kong wala, at alam kong stranded ka pa rin! tutulungan pa rin naman kita eh. magkaibigan tayo dba?? alisin mo muna ung galit sa puso mo para matulungan kita! kasi hanggat nandiyan yan, hindi ka makakatakas sa kania, lagi mong maaalala ung sakit nung iniwan ka nia. at hindi ka makakamove on.

Sa inyong dalawa:

problema nio dinadamay nio pa ko! hmp kayo! kung di ko lang kau kaibigan eh!

Confessions of a Daughter

I am student. I am an officer, a theater actress. I am cheerleader. I am critic, I am reader and a writer. I am an artist in my own ways. I am a dreamer of my own future. I am a dancer who can sing. I am a nature-saver. I am a lover, I am a friend. I am God's child. But above all, I am a Daughter.

I am an ordinary daughter. with an ordinary family, living in an ordinary world of mine. having an ordinary dream of becoming rich and living happily ever. see? my life is a cliche. and just like any other ordinary daughter, i want my parents to be happy and proud. most especially, my mom.

I am a student. A very good student. A consistent Honor Student since i was in first grade until i graduated. I like studying, though, i don't like reading much. every year, i gave her good sets of grades. I even made to the top 1 and graduated valedictorian of our batch. bcoz i know that will make her really happy and really proud. dahil hindi lahat ng parents ay maka-akyat sa stage para sabitan ang anak nia ng Gold Medal while everyone else was clapping. hearing her own daughter addressing the valedictory speech which not all the students can have the opportunity. seeing a very large medal hanging on her daughter's neck given by the Phil. President (GMA) and another large medal, smaller than the President's Medal but a bit larger than the usual medal, from the VP of the Philippines. I am an achiever.

Aside from being active inside the classroom, i am active also in curricular activities. I've been the President of the Student Council, they voted for me. I'm not just the geek achiever, but also a leader.

I have a strong personality. I joined the cat training course. I became a major(S3-Operation) when i was in 3rd year and a Lt. Col. (Corps Commander) in 4th year. I am the one initiates the form and who shouts "lumansag" at the end of each form. They call me Ma'am. I'm not just the geek achiever, not just a leader, but also a commander.
You may think na i'm a very good daughter, with these proud moments i gave her. but i think, i'm not. i'm not the so-good-daughter-that-doesn't-know-how-to-mess-up kid. the truth is, i mess up. i'm rebellious, i do bad things. i break her rules, i hurt her.

I remember a scenario. as far as my memory doesn't fail me this time, ito yata ung first time that i hurt her. I was just 8 or 9 at walang kuryente samin. It was dawn, the sun is about to set. I am a child, i like playing. Inaya ku ng mga frends ko maglaro, dahil walang ilaw walang magawa. so i went out. she was sick that time. and we're only three in the house. me, her, and my younger brother. bcoz she's sick, automatically i'm in charge of the house and of taking care of her. but, i chose to be outside, playing. that hurt her and she got mad at me. my very first time of sleeping outside the house. coz she wont let me in.

Ive hurt her before, i've hurt her RECENTLY, and i know i'm going to have mistakes and hurt her someday, or maybe sooner or later. she is a tough mother, tougher than you can think. ung kasabihan na "walang magulang na nakakatiis sa anak" doesn't work with her. i have proven it. but i know she's doing it in purpose. i will just be patient coz i know i'll thank her 1 day for all the panghihigpit she did. i'm not a vocal person, i don't say sorry and i love you for those people who deserve to hear it from me. and so when i say it, that's the time i really mean it.

TO HER: I'm thankful, I'm really sorry, and I love mom

A Date with the Kappa Rho Beta

Casts:

Kappa Rhos - Tammy, Nirih, Pare, Pek & Tian

Ale sa ukay - na may hinala factor pa kung nakuha na nga ba ni nirih ung pera na worth 65 pesos mula sa mga damit na binenta nia sa ukay. Laging nakangiti parang inistaple na!

Kuya sa Dunkin' Donut - na walang panukli

Ma'am Joyce - nakapink na officer namin sa CAT na nakita ni nirih sa BDO habang first time niang magdedeposit ng pera (puro xe withdraw alam), at wala pa rin pinagbago

Barker ng FX na papuntang Sm North - na iritable dahil gus2 sana namin na sa likod na paupuin si tian (xe dun kami nakaupo, at apatan lang un eh lima kami)

Zeline - ka-comment ko sa FS na hindi alam ang tunay kong pagkatao, na nasingit lang sa usapan while riding sa FX

Eric Clemente - clasmates namin nung elementary na nastroke at nasama lang sa usapan gaya ni zeline with a "Z"

Ma'am Aika - nagpasa sakin ng ranggo na Lt. Col. (corps commander) na naka-yellow ng araw na yon at hindi namin napansing kasabay namin sa fx dahil nasa harap xa sa tabi ng driver's seat

Jowa ni Ma'am Aika - walang pangalan dahil kahit na schoolmate namin xa at sa College xa nag-aaral at one year lang ang tanda nia samin eh hindi xa sikat, kaya "no name"

Waiter na may mahiwagang mata - waiter na parang walang nakikitang iba kundi kalat, paulit ulit umiikot sa Yellow Cab para humanap ng kalat at pag nakahanap na ng kalat eh tatanggalin ng di man lang nagsasabi ng excuse o nagtatanong sa customer kung pwede nia na bang kunin o ano

Nagpaparent ng bicycles sa Circle - na super kaway sa amin ng makitang patungo kami sa rentahan ng bike para magrent. hala sila super dami talagang nakaway akala ko airport

The Emos - grupo ng mga kabataan na kahit summer at maulan eh nakaboots at kawirduhan ng mga damit (hindi napapanahon), kumbaga makaporma lang, muka silang sasayaw kaya naiisip namin na may event that night

Jogging Boiz - nagjojogging sa kalagitnaan ng Circle na with matching chant at 6pm! (new trend, ndi na sa umaga ang exercise)

Date: May 15, 2008

(SFX: tingenengeneng)

I woke up at 8:30 ng umaga. Usapan xe namin ng kalabit ay 10am sa 7-11 (official meeting place). Ang male-late bibili ng malaking slurpee. But suddenly nagGM si jaja na hindi na daw xa makakasama dahil matuluyan ang sakit nia (naulanan xe siya kagabi), pati si pek nagtext din na biglang may lakad ang kaniang mga magulang, which means walang maiiwan para magbantay sa mga kapatid niang grabe kung makapag-request. Ibig sabihin hindi na rin siya makakasama. So, apat nalang kami, ako, si tian, nirih and pare. Nagdalawang isip kaming ituloy xe hindi maxadong masaya pag kulang. pero dahil si tian ay matagal ng naghihintay sa Smile Village (tapat ng North Olympus) para lang sa lakad namin ng araw na un (taga Bulacan na xe si tian), eh tinuloy na namin.

Ang usapang 10, ay naging 11. Si tian na dumating sa 711 ng 10:20 ay matagal na naghintay, buti nalang mahaba ang pasenxa. dumating ako sa meeting place ng 10:50. si munirih hindi ko na naorasan ang pagdating. when she arrives nagpunta na kami dun sa ukayan na pinagbentahan nia ng ilang mga damit. andun si ate na nakangiti, katulad nga ng sinabi ko kanina ay nagdududa kung nakuha na ba ni nirih ung 65 pesos. pero habang nagdududa ay nakangiti parin! The when we finished our business with the ukayan, we rode a jeep papuntang Sm Fairview, there may nakasabay kaming lalaki na nakapula which is very familiar ang look samin. At tingin ko, namumukaan nia rin kami kasi panay tingin sa grupo namin.

At SM, magdedeposit si nirih ng pera sa bangko para sa pangenroll ng pinsan nia. dahil kailangang sakto ang ideposit na 1,900 (2k pera nia) nilibre nia kami ng donut sa dunkin' donut para mabaryahan ung pera nia, dahil walang panukli ung kuya sa dunkin' na naka-assign sa booth dun kami pumunta sa pwesto talaga. Nagpaiwan kami dun ni tian xe bawal ang tambay sa BDO. While waiting, dumating si pek, (nagtxt siya earlier na iiwan nlang daw ang mga bata sa Lolo at Lola nia, aun pwede naman pla eh) na naka-monochromatic. Sa kainipan namin pinuntahan na namin si nirih sa BDO at nakapila pa rin xa nung dumating kami. Katabi nia si Ma'am Joyce na hindi namin alam kung nakikipila din o nakiki-osyoso lang.

And then we went to SM department store para maglibot libot habang hinihintay ang napaka-agang dumating na si Pare. (10 usapan! past 1 dumating!) Finally, kumpleto na ang Kappa Rhos na aalis ngaun. We can set off. We went to the terminal kung saan ang mga FX ay patungong SM North, sakto, lima ang kulang at lima kami. Pinipilit namin na maupo na si tian sa likod dahil kasya naman. Pumayag naman ang barker pero pinagbabayad pa rin xa, kaya sabi ko dun na siya sa gitna! duh? kikita pa ng extra si manong anu siya talakitok?! On our way sa Trinoma, as always, maingay kami. Lagi naming naiirita ang mga kasabayan namin sa sasakyan dahil sa ingay namin. Ang dami dami naming pinagkkwentuhan, we talk 200 words per minute! Alin sa mga nasama sa usapan namin ay si zeline. un ka-comment ko sa FS na hindi alam na ako si ai tamanaha! (bronze goddess xe nakalagay sa FS)(kung gus2 mu malamang ang wento nia ay tingnan mo nalang sa mga comment sa FS prof ko.) at si Eric clemente na nastroke daw na binalita ni sir jo kay ate ron at binalita ni ate ron kay pare na binalita naman samin!

Ang we finally reached our destination, TRINOMA. While crossing the street. napansin ni pare na may kahawig ung baabe na bumaba sa parehong fx na sinasakyan namin a while ago. Nung tiningnan nila, it was ma'am aika! kasama ang boifrend niang di kasikatan na skulmate namin. all this time na nagiingay kami sa fx at hindi humihinto kakadakdak ay may kakilala pala kami sa loob. hindi naman kami sa nahiya, duh? kmi mahihiya?! naman! hinayaan nalang namin si aika kahit alam nia at alam namin na napansin namin ang isa't isa. hindi namin siya binati anyway.

Plano sana nila manuod ng sine, pero wala kaming mapanuod na maganda bukod sa iron man kaya lang napanuod na un nirih kaya di din pwede (sabi ko kasi Ploning na lang eh! ehehe) kaya kumain nalang kami sa yellow cab. umorder kami ng manhattan meatlover na 18" worth 700 (bago toh smin, xe fumafastfood lang kami lagi eh) at kaniya kaniyang bili ng softdrinks except kay nirih na mineral water ang inorder. Sobrang busog na kami sa laki ng pizza na feeling namin eh aabot na hanggang pangkinabukasan ung kinaen namin! pinilit parin namin maubos dahil ala nga namang ibalot namin tatatlong slice nalang! (square cut)

Nang naubos na ang pizza at nagkabondat bondat na kami sa dami ng nakaen. naghnap kami ng CR, at sa paghahanap namin may nakita kaming bilihan ng libro na sale. "99.00 Buy 1 Take 1" xempre, makakamura kaya bumili kami ng tig-iisa, except na naman kay nirih na di bumili dahil wala daw siyang pambili!

Eto ung mga nabili namin:
This Body - Tammy
The Haunter - Tian
Innocence - Pare
Nothing to Fall Back On - Pek

Sumakay na kami papuntang cirlce, bumaba sa NHA, at first time naming dumaan sa S. Belmonte Underpass (ung sa tapat ng QC Hall). Maulan ulan pa, ang layo ng nilakad namin para mahanap ung rentahan ng bike. When we're close to that place, biglang nagsulputan ang mga nag-aalok ng pa-rent ng bike na nagkukumaway sa aming lahat (telling na sakin na kau magrent ng bike). Hindi ba nila naisip na baka imbis na mag-rent at kumita ang isa sa kanila ay mawala pa ung customer dahil sa takot? Anyway, back to my story, nagrent kami ng 3 single at isang may side car which cost 80 each for an hour-and-a-half. (hindi kasi marunong magbike si pek kaya dun xa sa may side car!)

While nagpepedal, we encounter the Emos, na kumakanta ng "Getchingin" ng EB Babes. Muka silang sasayaw na ewan! Nakakapagod pala magbike. para na rin kaming nagexercise. Wooh, the sweat, the heat. Around 6:20 tinapos na namin ang aming Joy-Bike-Ride. Dahil padilim na din at naisipan pa naming daanan ang gitna ng Circle kung saan matatagpuan ang mataas na monumento kung saan nakalibing si Quezon. Nung tanaw na namin ang manumento, tanaw na din namin ang ilang kalalakihan na nagjojogging ng alas sais ng gabi with matching pachant chant pa. After non, napagdisisyonan na naming bumalik sa SM dahil madilim na din.

Ang haba ng nilalakaran papuntang sakayan. Tumawid kami sa dalawang overpass at nadulas pa si nirih nung malapit na kaming makababa. Yackness, umulan pa aman kaya maputik. ewww. Sumakay kami sa jeep at siningil ng 20 papuntang sm, which i think is mahal. xe ung kasabay ku nga lagi galing lawton to caltex 20 lang din ang binabayad estudyante kalayo kaya nun!

And our journey ends there, naghiwahiwalay na kami ng baba. Ako lang pala humiwalay xe pinapauwi na ako ni mama dhil nanalo daw xa sa bingo ng 5k at may balato ako! wawawa. ^^

P.S
Hindi ko na maxadong dinitailed pa ang mga pangyayari. Dahil if i will, sosobra ang haba nito! just sharing kung pano kami magspend ng isang buong araw na magkakasama. pra hindi naman magtaka ung iba kung bakit ganun nalang kami kabond, at pinaghihinalaan pa kaming isang FRAT! Masaya lang talaga, puro tawanan. Sobrang at ease, pwede mong sabihin lahat ng gus2 mong sabihin ng hindi magaalalang baka maging masama ka sa mata nila o mag-aalalang makakalabas sa iba ung sinabi mo. pagmagkakasama kami parang hindi nauubusan ng topic, lahat pwedeng iopen. walang tinatago, walang plastikan. at un ang sikreto kung bakit we're still standing as KALABIT PENGE. katulad ng unang tag line namin, at napatunayan na rin namin, na hindi kami matitinag!. dba nuh? dba nuh?

Last P.S.
JAJA! wawawa. wawa may sakit di nakasama. hehe next time!

Same Ground

Para sa mga nakabasa ng previous posts ko at nakarelate sakin:

Ang saklap dba? pero ganun talaga. When something ends, another opens. Sabi nga ni Paulo Coelho sa "The Zahir", "It's happened before, and it will happen again, I'm Sure." That won't be the last time na i'll get hurt. Iisipin ko nalang there is more to lifeI that I should know. And the best way to learn it, is to experience it. Kahit masakit, kahit nakakaiyak. If we're on the same spot, don't self-pity. Let's think of this: you're not the only one who suffer because the story of love he wanted didn't end up the way he wanted it to be. Hindi tua nagiisa. Look around, marami jan ang katulad ng situation natin. (magaling lang magtago yung iba) Kinaya nila, anu ba naman yung kayanin din natin. And above all, learn to forgive those who hurt you. xe if you don't the pain, will always remind you of her. And you'll never get over her. (Bakit her ginamit ko? wala lang. may pinapatamaan lang ako!)

Para naman sa mga nakabasa pero di nakarelate (or wala sa ganung istwasyon ngaun):

I know one day mararamdaman niu din ung ganitong pakiramdam. This is not a curse, I'm not cursing you. I'm just saying what might happen or rather what WILL happen. And if one day, you wake up and realize na andun ka na sa spot na tinutukoy ko. You are free to view my blog again. Then on that day, on that very particular moment, you'll trully understand. db?

I'll find love again. Again and again. and be hurt again, again and again. Naisip ko lang, at the end of a failed relationship, kahit sinasabi natin nakamove on na tayo, we really haven't. we're still there, waiting at the same ground. still hoping that someday, some time, the people we love will realize that they cant find another us. and they will come back to our arms, and we will live happily. what a fool's thought! Pero it's a sign. A sign na we haven't completely moved on. awtch.

OO. masarap single. walang bawal bawal. pero hindi palagi!
*there's no one to greet you gudmorning with a kiss
*walang magpapaalala na kumaen on time
*walang ttawag sa gabi para maggudnayt
*wlang magdadala ng fries habang nasa rehearsal ka
*walang magbibigay sau ng mga letters na kahit wlang thought eh gumawa pa rin xa dahil wala na xang mgawa kakaisip sau
*walang magbibigay sau ng lollipop ng wala lang
*walang tititig sau at ikaw nman magpapanggap na hindi mo xa nakikitang nakatingin sau
*walang aalalay sau sa jeep
*walang magtatayo sau pagnadapa ka dahil sa kaclumpsyhan mo
*walang magbibigay sau ng jaket nia pagnilalamig ka khit na xa ay namumula sa sobrang lamig (sakit toh)
*walang magddrama sau
*walang mgasasabi ng BEHAVE!
*walang tatawa sa mga jowks mo dahil sa sobrang kakornihan
*wala kang makakausap about sa isang topis, only to find out na pareho ang tumatakbo sa isip niu
*walang makakaisip na gumawa kau ng time capsule where you can put anything in it tapos mapapalit kau sa araw na pinagusapan
*walang mgsasama sau sa mga plano nia sa buhay. wala, wala!

wah! xyet. tsk. naaalala ku lang, hindi pa yan lahat a.

hindi naman ito talaga ang gus2 kong ishare sa iniu. pero i end up this way. next tym ku nalang siguro ishshare yung isa ku pang topic. I realize one thing: mas madaling magsulat kung nakakarelate ka sa topic. yng mga words bigla nalang nglalabasan. bigla nalang may tinatayp ka na. when i find a new love. when that day comes, tsaka ko na siguro ipopost yung topic na un. tsaka na.

pero ngaun, tingin ko. matagal pa un. matagal tagal pa.

para sa kanya:
hmmm. wala ku masabi. ang alam ko lang gus2 kita kausapin. pero di ko din alam sasabihin ko. so, hindi nalang. pero kung ikaw may sasabihin ka sakin. alam mu naman number ko. alam mu namn kung san ako. nahihirapan ako sau. tama sila, pareho tayo ng ugali. sobrang pareho. kaya siguro tau nagkaganito. kaya tau magkahiwalay ngaun. hindi ko na alam kung panu ka iaaproach. feeling ko di na kita kilala (siguro un din feeling mo sakin), ang layo na natin sa dating tayo. napagod ka na ba? hindi naman ako magkakaganito kung wala akong naramdamang mali. sanay ako sa malayuan, walang problema sakin dun. may tiwala din ako sayo. may mali lang talaga. sana alam mu kung ano ung maling un. mag-oorientation na ulit. natatandaan mu pa ba? d2 tau naging close. isang taon na. isang taon palang. pero iba na tau. malau na tau. months ago. masayang masaya pa tayo pareho coz we've found each other. pero ngaun, masaya ka pa ba? nagbago ka na, i admit may nagbago din sakin. pero sana, mabalik ung dating tau gaya nung nakaraang taon, sana bumalik tayo.

Decoding His Moves

Bago ang lahat, i'd like to offer this post sa isang tao! lam mo na kung sino ka sinabihan kita kaya wag ka ng magmaang maangan! Never in my wildest kembang na naisip kong magiging close kita. Salamat sa lahat ng comfort. Lam kong di ka din ok, may problema ka din, pero you're there. Thanks a lot. Sobrang laki mong tulong para matanggal sa isip ko ung mga bagay na hindi na dapat pinagiisip. And because of that, this one's for you.

Most of the time mahilig tau sa NON VERBAL COMMUNCATION. Yung mga pasimpleng ngiti, tingin, snob, emote emotan, pamiss effect na mga ganian part yan ng non verbal communication na sinasabi ko. And i know, GUILTY ka jan! lahat ng tao gingawa yan. We are hoping na makukuha ng partner natin kung ano ung gusto talaga natin ipaalam o ipaabot sa kanila through this non verbal communication. Pero the sad part is, slow sila! Hindi nila nakukuha yung mga pasimpleng tingin, ngiti or whatever naten! Tapos magagalit tayo xe we will think na our efforts are not recognized. Sayang sa effort. But in reality, malaki din yung mali natin dun. kasi at first place, hindi naman tayo dapat nagexpect maxado. That's the problem with humans, we EXPECT TOO MUCH. Lesson? We hurt ourselves by expecting too much. Yan ang isa sa mga natutunan ko nitong nakaraang taon! The down part is, tinuro sakin sa masakit na paraan! Misunderstood, nagkasira sira na lahat. And that's all because of expecting!

This senario happens a lot. Yun nga ung nakakapagtaka sa tao eh. After all, mahilig pa rin sila magexpect. Ito na ata ang pumapangalawa sa pride when it comes to destruction of relationships.

Being sweet. Isa pa yan sa mga ineexpect natin sa partner natin. Even with the smallest things. One way of being sweet is being affectionate. Not necessarily PDA! (teh, matanda ka na alam mo na dapat kung san at kailan lang pwede!) Lalo na sa mga girls. It means a lot to us. Kahit simpleng peck lang. Samin, it's one way of telling the world na mahal mo yung partner mo. ow... hehehe. When I was in high school may binigay sakin na Copy si Munirih. nakasulat xa sa yellow paper. It's a research about love. But more on research about kisses. Nakita ko xa ngaun ngaun lang, gusto ko lang ishare para next time you'll be kissed, you'll know how to interpret, or vice versa. The next time you'll kiss someone, you'll know where to kiss.

*********************************************************************************

1. KISS ON THE CHEEK .......... "We're friends"
2. KISS ON THE HAND .......... "I adore you"
3. KISS ON THE SHOULDER .......... "I want you"
4. KISS ON THE EAR .......... "I'm Horny!"
5. KISS ON THE LIPS .......... "I love you"
6. KISS ON THE NOSE .......... "Let's get silly but sweet"
7. KISS ON THE NECK .......... "I want you"
8. KISSING WITH EYES CLOSED MEANS .......... "I'm in love with you"
9. KISSING WITH THE EYES OPEN MEANS .......... "I'm watching where your hands are going"
10. HOLDING HANDS .......... "We can learn to love each other"
11. A WINK .......... "Let's get it on"
12. SLAP ON THE BUTT .......... "Watch out"
13. PLAYING WITH THE EAR .......... "I can't live without you"
14. ARMS AROUND THE WAIST .......... "I love you too much to let go"
15. PULLING HAIR ON HEAD .......... "Tell me you love me (too)"
16. HOLDING TIGHT .......... "Don't let go"
17. OFTEN THINGKING OF YOU MEANS .........."I care for you"
18. LOOKING INTO THE EYES MEANS .......... "Do you love me?/I like you hope you like me too"
19. SQUEEZING FINGERTIPS MEANS .......... "I want a kiss"
20. LEANING ON THE SHOULDER MEANS .......... "COMFORT ME"
21. GETTING OCCASIONAL SHORT HUGS MEANS .......... "I miss you"
22. BITING LIPS MEANS .......... "I'm jealous"
23. PLAYING WITH HAIR MEANS .......... "I adore you"
24. STEPPING ON TOES MEANS .......... "I hate you"
25. DREAMING OF YOU AT NIGHT .......... "You're someone special"
26. WEARING HIS/HER RING MEANS .......... "You're mine"
27. OFTEN GIVING YOU SOMETHING MEANS .......... "I care for you very much"
28. ALWAYS BEING WITH YOU MEANS .......... "I can't live without you."

*********************************************************************************

Ayan. Andyan na ang List. babasahin nalang! pero sinasabi ko sayo. wag ka pa rin maxadong umasa sa NON VERBAL COMMUNICATION NA YAN! bakit?! sure ka bang mababasa din 2 ng partner mo?

BE VOCAL! BE OPEN! based on experience ko na yan. makinig ka sakin! para hindi ka matulad sakin.

7 Stages of Recovery: A Guide In Reconstructing Yourself After the Heart Break

Sabi, ang life parang circle lang yan. As in parang may routine tayong sinusundan. May start and may finish line. At sa bawat finish line, may start ulit. Parang love, we started single, get to know someone, like them, fall for them, hurt by them, hate them, forgive them, and let go of them, then we go back to being single again. and the routine repeats itself.


It's funny how a person who was once your world, your reason of waking up in the morning, the one you start and end your day with, your happiness, your reason of existence, has just turned into someone who says "HI!", or gives a smile or worse, most of the time had just become a familiar face. Sad no? But that's a fact. Nangyayari talaga. I know you too encountered this already. Like I did. Moving on, I find it very very difficult, surely you'll agree. Pero hindi natin pwede takasan 'yon. Like it or not it's part of Life, part of Love.


Recovering. Iba-iba tayo ng way ng pag recover. May iba dinadaan sa music, yung iba nagbabago ng hair do, may naghahanap ng comfort, meron din namang gustong sinasarili nalang. Merong sinusugatan sarili, andyan din yung mga gumaganti, meron napapasulat ng poem or nakakagawa ng kanta. Maraming way. Nasa sayo na yun, on how you want to mend your broken heart. Iba iba man ang way, tulad ng sinabi ko kanina, may routine parin tayong sinusundan. Sinubukan kong i-break down yung mga routine na yun. I just thought this might can help those people na pinagdadaanan palang yung ganitong sitwasyon. Here it is:




7 STAGES OF RECOVERY***

first stage: NUMB PHASE
Or denial stage. Ito yung part na kahit maraming tao na yung nakakapansin na there is something wrong, deny ka pa rin. Ayaw mong maniwala na may mali, ayaw mong makinig sa iba. You're trying so hard para paniwalain yung sarili mo na OK lang lahat. Pinaniniwala mo yung sarili mo na hindi ka nasasaktan sa mga nangyayari at sa mga HINDI nangyayari. At kung mapansin mo ngang may mali, iniisip mo nalang na "normal lang yan". Hindi mo pinapansin yung sakit, yung sinasabi ng ibang tao. For short, you become blind and deaf by love. You become numb.



second stage: RECOGNITION PHASE
In this phase you already know that something is not right. Something has to be discussed. You finally ended up with the realization na may problema nga sa inyo na hindi lang dapat balewalain. Your barrier na nabuo nung numb phase which makes you incapable of seeing and hearing what's really happening ay unti-unti nang nasisira. You'll start asking sa ibang tao kung tama pa ba yung nangyayari sa inyo ng partner mo. Naghahanap ka ng kakampi na magsasabing ikaw ang agrabiyado, at dahil dun lalung lalaki yung sira ng barrier mo.


third phase: INTERROGATION PHASE
You'll ask kung bakit kailangan pang mangyari yung mga ganito. Dalawa ang pwede mong isipin; una, minsan ka na nga lang magmahal mali pa, or pangalawa, bakit sa lahat ng minamahal mo laging nageend up ng hindi maganda.


fourth phase: EMOTIONAL PHASE
Dito yung mga sleepless nights, wet pillows, tsaka pakikinig sa mga slow music or senti mode. Babalikan mo yung mga times na nagsisimula palang kayo ng partner mo. maipag-cocompare mo yung dating kayo sa kayo ngaun. And admit it or not dito yung time na feeling mo hindi ka na makahinga kakaiyak! aminin..^^


fifth phase: ACCEPTANCE PHASE
Nothing is permanent in this world. Matatanggap mo na yung fact na yun. And you'll start to let go SLOWLY. very very slow. Why slow? kasi in the corner of your heart you are still hoping na mababalik pa ang lahat sa dati, na may chance pang magka-ayos kayo. Hahanap ka ng ibang outlet, ng ibang mapagbibigyan mo ng attention. Gaya ng work, organization, new friends, etc.


sixth phase: INDEPENDENT PHASE
Well, ndi ka naman actually magiging man-hater/woman-hater. Magsisink in lang sa mind mo at marerealize mo na you can leave alone. You don't need a partner, you don't need someone to be with you. Na mas maganda ang buhay single. Walang pipigil, walang magbabawal. You can enjoy hanggang gusto mo. And you will constantly say na, "I'm better of ALONE".


seventh phase: FINAL PHASE
Sa stage na toh, you've got over completely. Walang halong bitterness o kung ano pa man. You'll start to date again, you want to try to love again. And the circle goes on and on.
Ano? Nakarelate ka ba? It's ok to go in circles. Basta don't do the same mistake ever again. Learn from your mistakes, forgive those who hurt you and forgive yourself. Love is a gift, but it is also a responsibility. We maybe different from one another, but one thing is for sure. In some point of your life you will Love someone completely more than you can ever imagine, and most of the time you'll be hurt, and you'll be surprised that the people who hurt you are the people you have love the most.